To the Class of 2023
You did it, Class of 2023! As far as graduating classes go, you’ve had more than your fair share of obstacles; yet here you are—triumphant! You have likely recently heard, and will continue to hear, many well-intentioned pieces of advice, often in the form of tired idioms (“reach for the stars,” “dream big,” and “take a leap of faith”). These are all fine sentiments, they’re just imprecise and not terribly helpful. Instead of being the 99th person to tell you to “pursue your passion in life” today, I’d like to be the 1st person to suggest a few pieces of more practical, though perhaps less lofty, advice. These are the things I wish someone would have told me when I graduated. So, I’m paying it forward to you, dear Class of 2023.
Go to the dentist.
Remember when you were a kid and Elmo and Big Bird tried to convince you that going to the dentist was fun and definitely not scary at all? They had noble intentions, but they lied to you. Nobody likes going to the dentist: the office smells weird, your mouth feels gritty from the polish they use on your teeth, and they always ask you questions you can’t actually answer because your mouth is actively being pried open. But, my dear, dear friends, do it anyway—like, right now, as you’re reading this. Take a second, go to your insurance’s website and find a local dentist (or find a low-cost dental care center, if you don’t have insurance) and make an appointment. Rip the band-aid off. Get it done. CDC data shows that 25.9% of adults are walking around with untreated tooth decay. Want to know what’s worse than spending 30 minutes in a dentist’s office? I’ll give you three guesses, but you should only need one (it’s having your teeth slowly rot inside your mouth).
Own a printer.
Bring me a rocking chair and a tombstone, because I will live and die on this hill. Although we live in the age of—and please read this in the style of green aliens from Toy Story— The Cloud, there are times you are going to need physical documents. What’s super fun about those times, is that they will send you into an all-out panic. The night before a job interview, you realize that it would be helpful to bring a physical copy of your resume. Your computer starts acting weird and you decide you should probably print out your tax returns for the past few years. A major life thing happens, and you need to fill out a form and have it notarized. These are all stressful situations in and of themselves. Don’t add the additional anxiety of calling every UPS Store and Copyworks in town to try and figure out a fix at the last minute. I know it’s annoying and you’ll almost never use it, but printers have never been cheaper. One day, everything will be digital, and as we jetpack around town, we’ll laugh at how we used to print things out like cavemen. But that day is not today. I’m not Elmo; I’m not lying to you. You need a printer.
Find water near where you live or work.
Times of great change are stressful—even if the great change is successfully completing one of your educational goals. You’ve got new academic credentials and new possibilities. It’s exciting, but it’s a lot, and sometimes, you just need to stare at a river or another body of water. Remember in “The Hunger Games,” when Haymitch told Katniss her first step in survival was to find water? No, because you’re an adult and that movie is for teenagers? Well, take my word for it. Haymitch knew what he was talking about. A study done last year shows that just looking at water outdoors (even a swimming pool!) will help lower blood pressure and heart rate. Find a spot you can walk to during your lunchbreak or on your commute. When you have a stressful day, stare out at the water, and remember that these water molecules have been here for billions of years before you, and they’ll be here long after you finish whatever project you’re stressed about.
Have at least one non-stick pan.
This one goes out to all of the newly graduated foodies. We all love to pretend to be chefs. Hollywood has made the nocturnal, swaggering, profanity-filled, life of a professional chef more interesting and public than ever before. It’s fun to blast your cooking playlist while you zip around the kitchen stirring and seasoning things. Maybe you’ve even invested in the fancy pots, pans, and tools used by some of your favorite celebrity chefs—I love that for you! One word of advice, however: I know it may not be cool, but have at least one non-stick pan in your house. Most chefs use stainless steel or carbon steel pans in their kitchens. This is because one pan will probably be used and washed 5+ times in a single night and because the restaurant employs someone to just wash dishes. That’s not the case in most home kitchens. Sometimes, you want to just make a fried egg without having to pry the burnt remnants off a cast-iron skillet before going about the rest of your day. Sometimes, you don’t want to pretend to be a chef; you just want to make pancakes on a Saturday and move on. In those cases, pull out your handy, lightweight, non-stick pan and live your best life. If you have judge-y foodie friends, hide it when they come over.
Meet your neighbors.
When you first move into a new place, there’s a window of time (60ish days) when you should meet your neighbors, exchange pleasantries, establish that they’re not creepy murderers, and then live peacefully in close proximity. You’ll occasionally wave to them, ask them how their child/pet/job/hobby is, and that’s it. In exchange, you now have a person that will probably let you into the building if you forget your key, someone who might be able to substantiate an alibi if you need it, or maybe even a new friend. Younger people are getting really bad at doing this, but it’s important. Get to know people, strengthen your community. Don’t live your life not making eye contact with people as you leave your house because you never got a chance to properly introduce yourself. If you missed the 60-day window, use the holidays as an excuse. Bake or buy some treats and bring them to your neighbors. Tell them you’re sorry you haven’t introduced yourself sooner. Show them that you’re not a creepy murderer. Building trust in your neighborhood or building is never a bad thing—remember, in the event of a zombie apocalypse, the people living closest to you are going to be your de-facto crew, at least for a while.
There you have it, fabulous Class of 2023, some very un-glamorous, but practical advice. You will, no doubt, do big things and change the world in major ways, but please also take care of you. Amid the hustle and bustle of pursuing your dreams, remember to give yourself space to grow, change, fail, and learn. As I’m sure they informed you in the speech given at your commencement ceremony, “commencement” means “beginning.” So, no matter what your age, your journey is just starting. If the Oregon Trail computer game taught us anything about journeys (and it certainly did), it’s this: Take breaks when you need to, surround yourself with people who understand and support you, and always increase water rations after someone is bitten by a rattlesnake.
